Wattie's Beef Lasagne

Being the critiques of microwave food from a sole charge video store clerk.

As I often dine on microwaved cuisine while at work, and find myself bored more often than not, I have decided to start reviewing my meals.

I start today with "Wattie's Beef Lasagne".

I was hesitant to eat microwave lasagne - could I trust the beef? Would I scald my tastebuds clean off?
I actually had this for the first time yesterday, but for the purposes of this blog I will chronicle and critique this "meal" as it happens - real time!

The packaging is typical Wattie's fare - functional, streamlined, fairly elegant but not a work of art. The description reads "Delicious beef lasagne with tomatoes, basil and a tasty cheese flavored sauce". Cooking time is 5 minutes on high in the holiest-of-holies, the microwave. The back of the packaging informs me that this meal is a good source of protein and lycopene, and will provide me with 1 of my daily servings of vegetables.

Unfortunately I don't have a digital camera available (perhaps in the future!). I would describe the meal's appearance as uninspiring, insipid. It resembles a bleeding piece of plywood with wood shavings haphazardly strewn about the top. Into the microwave:

As much as I respect Wattie's, I still season the lasagne with some salt and fine white pepper from the staff room pantry. As I'm too lazy to wash up later (not to mention not trusting the plates in the staffroom), I will be eating straight from the plastic packaging. Onto the meal itself...

Dear god, what am I thinking. Post-heating, it resembles a quivering mass of undifferentiated somatic cells. The (I'm assuming) beschamel sauce on top has actually bled or sweated some red residue, which I'm assuming has bubbled up from the mince below. The portion itself isn't entirely generous, but at $2.99 I'm not really complaining. It smells rather unassuming, mainly of the white pepper I applied earlier.

My first mouthful makes me wonder if I should have used a spoon, as it more resembles a soup than anything. The tomato sauce is quite acidic, but pleasant enough. Once I manage to get some of the pasta into my mouth along with the cheese/beschamel, tomato sauce and mince it's not actually that bad (Italian mothers and grandmothers everywhere turn in their graves). The cheese tastes rich and sharp, cheddary but nothing spectacular. Combining with the acidity of the tomatoes renders the meal palatable. The "beef" lends nothing to the taste, merely providing a ruminant while I contemplate what I'm doing with my life. The lasagne sheets themselves are floppy and tasteless, barely qualifying as pasta.

I'd have to say that this lasagne, at $3 a pop, is not a bad deal at all. It's fairly tasty, even if the beef and pasta leave alot to be desired. The cheese sauce itself is the highlight of the meal, with the tomato sauce lending some acidity to the flavour that balances out quite well.

Final verdict:

As microwave food: 8/10

As an actual meal:   4.5/10

I do hope you'll join me for the next instalment!